Friday, August 19, 2005

Today


Today I went to Yoga class. It had been quite a while, I've not felt well lately. The idea was to stretch out both physically and mentally, usually I feel better thereafter.

With all good intention to be in the moment of the meditation / position, I was reminded of my reality. Before class started the Yoga instructor was having a semi private conversation with one of the students in the class. It turns out that she, the instructor, did not know that the facility she was teaching at had childcare for those mothers with children. I knew that if Renzo were still here that, more than likely, he would be in childcare at that very moment. Because I thought their conversation would end shortly, I centered myself back into my own world, doing a mental -stretch - meditation of my own. However, their conversation did not end there.

I could not help but wonder, selfishly, why our instructor was cutting into class time while having a one on one with her student. Before you know it, the instructor addressed the whole class and thanked everyone who "took the time and trouble" to haul their children to the gym just so they could attend her specific class. With that in mind, our instructor told us that she was grateful, and therefore would really work harder to make it a worthwhile class for us now, and in the future. It was at that moment that the light came on...

What started as just another Yoga class, then transpired to a thank you to those with children in daycare, and ended with a debt of gratitude. I really liked her rationale and quest to work harder for us, it made sense in a very profound way.

Suffice it to say, I wish I were one of those mother's going through the "trouble" to have my baby there. I imagine that, as it goes, I'm always going to be reminded of what could have been, what should have been.


Lights will guide you home....