Faith ~ In Memory of Lorenzo B. Garcia

I started out this blog sometime in July. I knew the subject matter and came up with the title, "faith", thereafter. It's seriously no wonder why I never finished the blog entry. Before the passing of Lorenzo I seldom had a situation that I could not figure out or more likely just have and idea about, but the sudden passing of Lorenzo gave me the challenge of a lifetime.

How does one even fathom the passing of their child? To this day, at times, I shake my head in disbelief that "this happened" ~

Sometimes in my sorrow I look at my husband and say "I cannot believe we lost a child". As days past, soon months, somehow we are still standing. Somehow the smiles that were so blue are more common than not.

Life has carried on and somehow we are still here. I can only speak for myself when I speak about what has pulled me through the darkness. Because there are so many variables in grief, I could not possibly cover all angles of recovery, but the one thing that has always been my salvation is "faith" itself.

I liked one of the webster's dictionary definition on faith:

b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2) : complete trust

Yes, I actually had to look it up just to define it. Faith to me has always been more of a feeling than something I just cross my fingers to and "hope" for.

So what is it that I believe so strongly about, yet have no proof to present? God. With that in mind, how does that make things acceptable or even better? Not being a fan of cliche's, I don't want to necessarily say that "things happen for a reason", but there is something to that statement that rings true for me, although not as black and white as it may sound.

One cannot truly explain faith, nor can one explain God. For me, it seems to all go back to that interpersonal "feeling" of "knowing" that through all of our heartaches and challenges that there truly is a place "over the rainbow" where our hearts and minds will finally be at peace.

Needless to say, it is through our lifetime of experiences that we draw our conclusions about life. I've been blessed more than not, I am thankful to say. I can only offer, in the midst of the darkest times, to seek the positive and strive for the light that is there for the taking...